To all mothers in
every circumstance, including those who struggle- and all will- I say “Be
peaceful. Believe in God and yourself. You are doing better than you think you
are.” -Jeffrey Holland
I grew up in an environment where women are empowered. My
mom single-handedly raised us when my father died. I was only 6 that time, my
younger brother at 4. Life was hard but I didn’t know that because my mother
was able to conceal the ugly side of life.
Fast forward to present and I am now a mother myself. My
daughter will be turning 3 this May and so far, I’m still able to cope up with
the hustle and bustle of motherhood. Wow! Life’s pretty amazing and chaotic
with a toddler.
Being a millennial mom, these are the things that I’ve
learned and experienced that I want to share with you. If you are a mother
yourself, I know you can relate with these. If you are expecting or planning to
have kids in the future, these might give you an idea of what awaits you.
#1. A baby is not always cute, they could get in your nerve.
But in a single smirk your heart will melt.
When Aki was just a week old, I struggled with breastfeeding
especially at night. She’d be asleep the whole day and awake at night. It was
very hard. I had difficulty adjusting especially that it was only me and my
husband helping each other. One time, Aki peed and pooped on my face. I cried
afterwards, feeling horrible and irrelevant. Then, Aki cooed and smiled. Okay,
she’s so adorable I forgot in an instant that she just made me a human toilet.
#2. A “me-time” is still an elusive dream.
No chance at all especially if you’re breastfeeding and you don’t
have a babysitter. I had my me-time when Aki was already weaned. Still, being a
working mom is an added barrier in attaining that elusive dream. Yeah, like
having a mani-pedi sesh or drinking Milk Tea. But nonetheless, I wouldn’t trade
motherhood to anything.
#3. Being a mother requires you to change priorities in life
It’s no longer about you. It’s already about ‘us.’ Plural. You
have a completely dependent person to attend to and it means giving up late
night chitchat with friends, cost-cutting on make-up and other expensive beauty
essentials, among other things. Your child will be your priority. You will buy
tons of clothes and stuff for him or her and not mind wearing the same set of garbs
every time.
#4. It is true that patience is a virtue.
Motherhood will test your patience. It’s a test of endurance,
tolerance, and tenacity. I am a work in progress. I still get pissed off easily
especially when Aki gives me that I-am-a-toddler-I-am-entitled attitude.
#5. I am enough and I should not compare myself with other
mothers.
I have to give you a heads up. Mommy, it’s okay to get
inspiration from other mommies and mimic their parenting style. What is not okay
is comparing yourself and feel less of a person when you think you are not
giving your best. Listen to advices but if you feel another mom is manipulating
you, or making you feel like you’re doing all things wrong, step back and collect
yourself. As long as you are not harming your child, you are in good physical
and mental health, you are amazing.
Xoxo,
Mommy Bev
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