SAHM Depression is Real

I am a queen and I am stronger than depression.

Motherhood is tough.

Challenging.

Life-changing.

But motherhood is a role I gladly embraced as a woman. I love being a mom since day one. However, there are days that I don't get to be the best version of myself and at times I just see 'me' staring blankly with so many things going on in my mind.

I used to work in the field and traveling to different cities was my norm. When I decided to be a SAHM, I got ecstatic at first. Months passed by and I was like, oh no! I'm getting crazy. I needed to go out otherwise I would lose myself. That's when I did a rebirth of my personal blog. The creation of Mga Kwento ni Nanay became my outlet. I spent days organizing my thoughts as to what I want to happen with my blog and how I could potentially reach other Filipino moms to share their joys and struggles as mothers.

I have an online side job at night but during the day I often find myself surprisingly sad and lonely. Don't get me wrong, I am happy to be physically present with Aki and get to take care of my little family. But then, a certain emotion inside me wanted to come out and needed attention.

One day I was browsing my feed when I saw an article about stay-at-home-mom depression. I never wanted to admit I was going through that because I didn't want to be ridiculed by others and be the receiving end of 'I told you so'. I let it pass. I suppressed myself from that thought.

Came time I broke down and cried to my husband because I could no longer bear it. I was exhausted and felt useless despite being productive every day. SAHM depression is real. In the silence, or in the absence of it, lies a woman who used to be successful in her chosen career but opted to stay at home for her child.

Being the positive person that I have become, I fought it back. I went back to my hobby of reading books and I tag along Aki going to the mall or to the groceries. There are still days that I feel lonely and helpless, but I have a support system that I know I can count on.

If you are depressed, the first thing you need to do is to acknowledge it. You must identify that it is indeed depression and you need help. You can’t just go on with your life and not address the issue just because you think it’s nothing or you’re too busy to even think about it. Why am I saying this so? Because hiding such a strong emotion or state of being depressed will take a toll on you in the long run. You need to help yourself out.

What you can do:

1.     Talk to your husband

2.     Do your regular routine to avoid sulking in bed while you just let your child watch her favorite Youtube Kids channel (though tempting at times but help yourself out, mommy).

3.     Loneliness is a trigger for depression so go out at times. Have regular breaks from being a full-time mom and housewife. Beautify yourself by going to your favorite salon or get your make up brushes and doll up.

4.     Read a book.

5.     Join online mommy support groups. Hit the search button of your Facebook app and type in TBDM Mommy Club.

6.     Get sleep as much as you can. A good sleep can help you relax and clear your mind from worries.

7.     Avoid negative individuals. When you sense someone, who is too negative or has a lot to say about things in an undesirable way, go away. Unfriend, unfollow, unsubscribe.

8.     Call a friend you know will listen and understand you. As to my case, I have a virtual friend on skype who is also a Christian SAHM. We clicked right away because she used to be an accounting head as well and gave up work for her two-year-old daughter.

9.     Seek professional help when needed.

Ravaan lang, Momsh! I know you can do it. We are made of tougher stuff. 😊 Remember, we are the queens of our own household.