FROM CORPORATE TO STAY-AT-HOME-MOM: HOW TO COPE UP WITH THE TRANSITION

Sometimes the strength of motherhood is greater than natural laws. -Barbara Kingsolver

I was a Medical Sales Representative in a Multi-National company for six years when I finally decided to leave the corporate world. I was at that point in my life where I felt I was no longer fulfilled as an individual. I loved my job, the company, and the people that I had worked with, but I felt something was missing. I was also having problems with our babysitter that when she brought her boyfriend in our house without asking permission it made my decision to resign even stronger. I felt like missing a lot of moments with my daughter when I should be the one spending more time with her that she’s still a toddler. I prayed and asked help from my spiritual mentors and to my husband who supported me all the way. It was a leap of faith, having a little savings and the fear of what will happen next.

I was filled with fear before I resigned. I was not sure of how things would turn out. Indeed, fear is a powerful force that one should address well. I got used to working since I graduated from college and I was raised from a family where women are empowered. I was not used to asking money from anyone especially from my husband. I was a very driven career woman. I am still driven, and motherhood is a very fulfilling career I must say.

When I resigned, I spent one whole week in the house without going out. We didn’t have a helper, so I did everything from cooking to doing laundry while Junjak’s at work. It was tiring and the transition from being in the corporate to staying at home was dramatic. We decided to spend one month in the island where my husband was born and enjoyed a much-relaxed life. There were times that I would wake up very early and would prepare for work only to realize I was unemployed. When I checked my money in the bank and saw it diminishing I would clamor to my husband. My uncle taught me one real lesson in life that many would find it hard to live, that is to let go and let God.

Sometimes we do things not because we like it but because we just have to. Adulting is real. Bills, house mortgage (thanks God my parents let us stay in our old house for free), food, milk, and almost everything that you need to spend money of. However, it depends on us on how we live by the moment. I like the faith of a child. It does not mind about what happened in the past nor worry about the future. They just exist in the moment.

So how did I cope up with the transition from the corporate job to a stay-at-home mom? I created a list below that might be helpful to those planning to leave their job and be a full-time mother.

1.       Have a good support from your spouse or family.

Your support system is very important in this transition. Many people will ask a lot of questions on why you resigned and would even give you unsolicited advices that would make you feel like you did the wrong decision. Have a clear answer to why you are leaving and hold on to that. You need not to answer all your circle’s questions. You know the best support I got was from my husband: he didn’t say anything after he told me to resign because he saw me struggling already. He just listened to me. He was my shock absorber and my financer while I was waiting for my last pay.

2.       Be emotionally prepared.

Imagine spending most of your time at work for so many years that staying a few days at home would surely make you uneasy. You find yourself wanting to go outside or else you would lose your mind. And it’s okay. It’s normal. I had that feeling too during the first few weeks being a SAHM (Stay-at-home-mother). What I did when my daughter’s sleeping, I would read a book. I created a hobby to keep my sanity. I also have a time-out or me-time moments like going to the salon for a mani-pedi sesh. If you are from Butuan City, check out Habibi Salon Boutique and Spa ( https://www.facebook.com/HabibiSalonBoutique/ ).

3.       Settle everything at work before leaving.

Do not leave your work hanging. Talk to your immediate manager and go with the legal process. Offer help to the company to make the resignation/transition easier. In my case, I had a heart to heart talk with my boss before I rendered my resignation letter. I told her before the realignment of our division, so it would not be hard for the district to assign the territory managers in the designated areas.

4.       Adjust your finances.

Budgeting is not my thing although I was used to recording my expenses when I was still in college, since I was a scholar of my Aunt. I had financial reports every end of the month, so I was able to account my money well. However, when I started working in the corporate world I was relaxed with my spending habits that between me and Junjak, he’s a better financier. Since my husband was the only one working for us, I needed to go back to recording our expenses and income, so we won’t fall out of budget. As much as possible in buying things at the groceries, weigh if it’s a need or a want. I became conscious of the price tags even more.

5.       Never stop learning and/or earning.

I don’t know how long you will decide to be a SAHM but it’s good to keep your growth active. Never stop learning and enhancing your skills, so when you decide to come back at work in the future you can still be as competitive as the other applicants. https://www.skillshare.com/ offers a variety of online courses you can choose. You can also start a homebased online job that will allow you to earn even when at home.  https://www.onlinejobs.ph/login is a website where you can create an online portfolio and find online jobs available that would fit in your skills. If you are a business-type of person you can start your own business with a small capital like a Sari-Sari Store. https://www.e-tesda.gov.ph/ offers online TESDA courses and if you are really determined to start a small store, a beverage company can give you a start up money in a form of loan.

I hope that this article can help you in a way, power Nanays. Keep the faith. Remember, you are not just a mother or a wife, you are empowered. Who run the world? 😊 Girls!